Random Army Blog - by Professional Comedian, Random Vaughn: Memories come & Go, BUT "American Cars" always give you anal warts

Friday, December 28, 2007

Memories come & Go, BUT "American Cars" always give you anal warts

Hey Random Army,

Well just a short update today... first I want to let all of you know I finally got a new car. Yes I know many of you are thinking... I didn't even know what kind of car Random had... or I really dont care what kind of car you drive... or better yet "What kind of car would Random Vaughn drive?" Now that is a good question.

First you have to consider the fact that the last time I got a car was in 2000. So basically 8 years ago. This is PR 9/11, but just after the fake Y2K scare. yes it was a strange time. I didn't even know exactly if I could make a living doing comedy. However with all this I found a car that I thought I could love and that would love me back. And it did... at least tell I finally gave in to the cars continually wanting to have anal sex with me without a condemn on!!! Then I found out the truth... ANAL WARTS!!!

So what kind of a car gives you Anal Warts? ... a Chrysler Pt Cruiser

Yep I bought one... and it only took me 8 long years to finally get rid of the damn thing. So Good Bye piece of shit, I no longer have to drive you, but the gifts you have given me will stay with me for a life time.

1 comments:

The Scott Blog said...: I've owned 3 cars in my short lifetime. I recked each one of them. This is why I'm a bike-riding, subway hopping, urban dweller.; January 4, 2008 7:38 AM

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Hello Random Army

Hey what's up Random Army! I know you are as excited as I am for the next several upcoming months; because at no other time of the year do more people do more stupid shit, which provides me with so much wonderful material to make you laugh!!!

Also, I'm about to start posting on here and several other places video podcast and audio podcast...because you..the Random Army needs to be entertained.

If you are new and are not apart of the Random Army and maybe don't even know what The Random Army is. The Random Army is individuals, Men, Women, Boy's and Girls, small farm animals, manuals and reptiles who love humor, comedy, and of course randomness. But most importantly the Army is a unified force of laughter, constantly finding the humor and laughter in all of life's weird situations.

You can spot Random Army Members everywhere, for example the next time you are at the airport and you see a guy getting "wonded" by airport security and he is either laughing or smiling. that is a Random Army Member!

So if you are not a Random Army Member and you want to become apart of The Random Army and receive your Random Army dogtags. All you have to do is send an email with the following information.

Full Name:

Gender:

Birthdate:

Email Address:

Home Address:

Home Phone:

Recruited By:

T-shirt Size:

Codename:

Also ask to become a "friend" of R for Random and that is it€it is completely free to be a member for the Random Army. Once you information has been reviewed, confirmed and approved you should receive your Random Army Dogtags within 10 business days.

So if you still don't understand what the Random Army is or what a Random Army Member does... keep reading

So what is the random army, many of you continually ask me "What is the army?"

The simplest answer is "It is a collective, a united group of people who love laughter, jokes, comedy in any form, who actively participate in not just laughing but creating.

So you then you ask "How does one participate in creating?"

A random army member participates in the creation of comedy in several ways, the simplest way is to write in email, post blog comments, etc that you think are funny, this is the lowest form of creative participation.

The highest form of creative participation is through a wiki style of creation, under the concept of "how can we make this funnier."

Example:

I post a to the blog (www.rforrandom.com or www.myspace.com/rforrandom) a YKYW bit

The RAM (Random Army Member) reads the post and figure out a way to make it funnier and posts a blog comment, then another RAM reads the alternative YKYW and improves on it. Thereby continually adding to the funny!